She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
I'm just going to text him the word sex repeatedly until he comes over.
Did it work?
Duh, it only took 27 texts and 15 minutes and he was at my front door.
Whoever invented the gimlet should be given a medal and then shot
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
He seemed genuinely disappointed when I told him I wasn't going to make out with him to Bring Me To Life by Evanescence so I feel like I've pinpointed the breaking point of this relationship
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
I am mentally ready for anal.
He’s going to a lawnmower race. I got a Brazilian and he’s racing a lawnmower race. Pick me up. I’m not wasting this waxing on John Deer
Randomize
