take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
I might scale it back and go as an investment banker. Which is the exact same costume as James Bond on LSD. I just introduce myself differently.
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
I found you laying in the kitchen with a bottle of vodka and a slice of bologna on your face. You said you were having a spa day.
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
I woke up with a treasure map drawn on my ass. Whattt.
The streets are paved with hand jobs
Randomize
