I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
She bit a glass in half.
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
I ended up staying at a police station for being a witness in a public masturbation case..NOW do you believe me that I've never had a good St. Patrick's Day?
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
But you have work tomorrow. And a whore to pick up. And a dinner to eat. And a vagina to slaughter. Your day is full!
I appreciate the concept of vaginal slaughtering.
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
We were destined to go to rehab together
Drunk level: ugly crying in the bar upon discovery of sweet tarts and not smarties.
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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