I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
I feel like I should put "don't judge me" in the special instructions for the pizza guy.
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
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He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.
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Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
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