i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
Well I knew we were drunk when I told you it was a good idea to shit in the ocean
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
Randomize