Your mouth is God's brothel.
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
Randomize