Like all of my pajamas are shirts of guys I shacked with in college
doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
Upon hearing of his newfound access to every orifice... even ones he just made up... the Grinch's penis grew three sizes that day.
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
Randomize