i finished masturbating and realized my blackberry had accidentaly called my grandmother in my pocket during it. awkward...
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
I was tripping balls on the bathroom floor and his dog walked in. The lights in his bathroom have motion sensors, so I thought his labrador retriever was Jesus.
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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