Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like having to pee in a condom for my cousin so that he can pass a drug test.
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
Apparently when cookies are around I think of myself as a puppy and reward myself for everything #WhoIsAGoodBoy
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
When we sit on the couch watching TV, she always cups her hand around my balls. Not sure if it's a sign of affection or a "power play" to remind me just how vulnerable I am if she chooses to make an aggressive squeeze.
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