big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
Our phone convo was getting intense. Then I heard her say "quiet mommy is trying to have phone sex"
fuck he's narrating my life in a british voice make him stop im way too fucking high for this
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
I bit my tongue so hard I left a deep imprint. Fuck you tongue, stop getting in the way of food.
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
Even my conscience is telling me to take this Wednesday's exam buzzed.
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
Randomize
