and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking rosé, bitch!
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
I texted him: “Come over for the Super Bowl. I promise lots of scoring.â€
My divorce is turning into a porn script
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