Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
Thats the last time im "arresting" you to get out of paying your bar tab.
What?! The only reason I married your sister is to have a Cop in the family!
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
woke up with empty beer can still duct taped into my fists and the word "dove" written on the back of my neck
I just want nice things and good sex
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
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