i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
there was a trapeze. enough said
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
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