i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
pretty sure that I broke my nose during sexting. Life is grand.
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
you went over to those random dudes and told them you were an ordained minister and would like to bless their food. they laughed and agreed, then you said "now bow your heads in prayer" as soon as they did you grabbed a taco off their tray and bolted out the door.
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
Randomize
