Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
I'm in my boyfriends bathroom and I shit so bad, there was no toilet paper but his mom's clothes were on the floor and I wiped my butt on her underwear... now it looks like she sharted
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
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