so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
Watching porn with a bag of marshmallows. Thats when you know you're stoned.
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
When a guy wants to eat something off you and then comes back with microwaved strudel and custard, back the fuck out. I have apple-chunk burns on my tits.
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
Getting food poisoning after eating at work was the cherry on top of my "Welcome back to real life" sundae.
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
Randomize
