dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
Hey also tomorrow casually bring up wearing crocs to your sister's wedding
Did you leave it the depths of Magic Mike's favorite banana hammock?
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
Randomize
