What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
Did you ever feel like going into a planned parenthood and performing an abortion in front of them?
Umm..who the fuck is this?
Oh shit
Then I received a text in French, that roughly translated to "all you'll ever be good for is sex on the Internet"
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No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
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You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
All three of my roommates have their significant others over. We're all hanging out in the living room. It's like I'm the trifecta of third-wheeling
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
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