Note to self: When getting ready to leave with a kid in a wheelchair don't say Let's roll
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
Ever the responsible adult, I just realized that today is the Obamacare deadline, but I'm too high to handle insurance now.
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
Remember how we use to say "this will be the year I'll get my shit together!" And like we stopped doing that because we know that isn't happening anytime soon.
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
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