Come home. Im drunk and cutting my own hair. This is bad, i need you.
I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
23 Bosses Confess The Craziest Thing They’ve Seen An Employee Do
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
you dont understand this isnt a sit at a sports bar eating wings and having a beer night. this is a show up to the bar with a fith of Jack and just let what happens happen kinda night. im expecting to smack a bouncer
Ok let me change into clothes i can run in
He could have been a one armed faceless howler monkey. I was so slammered that I didn't care what I was having sex with or if whatever it was... was doing it right.
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
19 People Confess What It’s Like To Have Sex With Someone That Is Transitioning
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
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