walked into a party last night, i saw 3 ex gfs standing in a circle talking to each other...that's the quickest u-turn i've ever made in my life.
wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
A log hopped out of the fireplace and caught the carpet on fire. Good summary of this election if you ask me.
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
Randomize
