I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
My chance to home wreck was right in front of me and I didn’t grab it by the balls
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
Randomize
