where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
I bought you a small gift as a preemptive apology for being a drunken slut tonight.
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
I was not drunk enough for that final.
Randomize
