That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
bro, sorry for: trying to put you on fire yesterday, telling the bouncer that it was you that broke the bottles, and to have slept with your sister.
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
she kept asking for a lobster dinner while she was crying. it was actually the most reasonable drunk chick request i've ever heard.
I'm going to have to start playing roller derby again so I can blame my sex-related bruises on that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
You screamed "i promise ill stop blowing your brother" in the middle of a packed restaurant at 1pm. We should maybe rethink our relationship.
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
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