So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
Lesson learned: don't hide your vodka in your little brothers toy box.
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
The girl beside me at the laundromat is bitching a guy out on the phone for jizzing on her bedspread. She had to use a triple machine to wash it.
you puked on the porch, i can see your jacket on the floor next to your underwear. i know your home, unchain the door, you're the worst roommate ever.
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
My sex life reached a new low tonight: we stopped into this bar so I could pee and when I got out of the bathroom my parents had ordered a round for us and this traveling nurse they met and were trying to run game for me. Saddest part? She was actually going for it.
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
He pulled out a Plan B pill and handed it to me as I left like it was a party favor. God Bless America.
Randomize
