We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
How could you not respond to a text containing the words "goat man" ?!?
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
When you're trying to sneak from the bathroom to your room with dildo, but it glows in the dark and suddenly your entire life is illuminated in the shape of dick
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown
Randomize