I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
Why am I drunk on a roof painting at 11 in the morning
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
Tell him "come over but don't bring a flaccid dick"
Wear something tight
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
Randomize
