East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
My phone has seen less use in the last three days than Tom Brady's condoms.
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
You came out of the bathroom, said "I'M DRUNK BUT I REMEMBERED TO WASH MY HANDS!" and then insisted that she smell them.
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
I got the shit slapped outta me last night but the pain in my jaw doesn’t even compare to the hangover I have.
Randomize
