She actually said during sex "the only thing that would make this more perfect is if we were listening to Lenny Kravitz"
So, obviously, you had to give a fake number this morning.
Yes. Also, we may never be able to go back to that bar again.
Hes a 32 yr old divorced sailor that calls me almost every night drunk begging me to call him big daddy. I think i might need to change my number.
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
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The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
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First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
Woke up this morning with fake blood all over my bed which is a positive considering last year it was all real blood
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
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