Yours is on the dinner table...mine is in my underwear drawer.
you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
How external is "for external use only"?
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
Does it still count as a valentine if it's drunk phone sex at 3 in the morning
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
Who knew that the guy I fucked on your front lawn during welcome week freshman year would turn out to be my husband
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
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