Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
nothing cures the holiday blues like an open bar
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
Like real life can suck my metaphorical dick right now.
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
Youre a wreck. Youll be in your dorm weeping to project runway covered in pizza sauce and smelling of stale beer
Randomize
