she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
THERE IS NOT ENOUGH CAPSLOCK IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD TO EXPRESS MY CURRENT STATE OF WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED
When I took off my jeans he became more excited about my Elmo underwear than sex but to be fair, who can blame him. They're awesome undies.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
Bar selfie Saturday turned into bar nudie Saturday in a hurry. I need to delete my snapchat...
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
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