why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
this will be a night to untag.
I don't have a choice really. It's either lose 15 lbs by Halloween, or I'm going as a giant banana.
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this"
It's like a bag of dicks covered in taint sweat pounding a pregnant baby walrus.
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Randomize
