Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
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