that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
I just asked my mom if I could be the drunk realitive at the reunion. She said as long as I'm not obvious.
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
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