Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
I'm sorry to inform you but your friends with benefits card has expired has the beginning of the year. If you wish to renew your card you must submit a picture of a fully erect penis. Please note that not all request for a FWB card is accepted.
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
Dude he's the best wing man ever. He starts creepin' on a woman, and she clings on to you out of fear.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
Definitely got a blow job in Charles Schwab's bed last night.
I love my job.
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
Randomize
