Why does it say "go to Planned Parenthood tomorrow" on my dry-erase board?
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
This Pinterest wedding planning is a good distraction. I'm great at this, my imaginary wedding is beautiful
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
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