so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
I fear hooking up with people who have white pillowcases because my guyliner always smears on it and i either have to A. sneak out in the night or B. wash it and see them again
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
I'm a terrible person when I drink. I went from fine to not making any sense and yelling about cheese in like 30 seconds.
You thought they were asking for volunteers for a karaoke contest so you jumped up not realizing it was actually a "last 3 minutes boxing match". But you took that right hook like a champ.
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
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