I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
do nipples grow back?
Randomize
