that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
If I die tonight, I want you to know that your sister is awesome in bed
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
Randomize