And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
well..after leaving the bar you handed me your wallet and said you didnt need it cause you were going to find the cash cab and added 'i'll see you on tv'
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
im eating kix cereal and taking shots by myself. please come hang out with me. im desperate
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
In what world does 'I'm awake' at 2:30 in the morning on a wednesday translate to 'let's fuck' in the span of one text? Where has the romance gone?
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
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