..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
What happened last night?
You soiled yourself again and told everybody that you'd given birth.
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
Just opened a beer with eyelash curlers... miss you.
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize
