well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
I intend to get homeless drunk
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
I told him I was engaged, had 911 on speed dial and made him wear his seatbelt, then dropped his drunk ass off at his motel...probably not the night he was expecting.
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
NOT EVEN KIDDING RIGHT NOW. THE GUY IN THE SPIDERMAN COSTUME JUST FELL OFF THE ROOF INTO A BABY POOL. GET HERE NOW!!
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
she definitely didn't appreciate it when you justified bringing her home by yelling to me "fat bitches need love too"
The gate guard just said to me, "I almost didn't recognize you in uniform. Welcome back." I think I need to lay off the booze.
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
Randomize
