Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
I'm going to try to be reasonable tonight and keep my drink count out of double digits
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
Dude. Where are you? There's a hot chick drunkenly dancing on the bar and aggressively taking shots to Pink songs. She looks like she needs a rebound. Get. Here. Now.
FUCK NYC TRAFFIC.
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
The cop told you he couldn't let you pee. You just pulled your pants down and squared anyway and im surprised you didnt get arrested.No more drinking for you.
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
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