You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
he proceeded to punch 3 mailboxes in a row and when i asked him why, he said "because they were talking shit"... i need a new boyfriend. and a new life.
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
It's either my own vomit or popcorn butter in my ear right now. Banking on the second one.
We made popcorn last night. So it's both
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
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