i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
I just farted in the dogs face to show him who's boss
Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
Let the clothes fall where they may.
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
my penis made a compromise with my morals
Randomize
