Hows this for an invention: a toilet that weighs your poop
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
You told me I was special while we were having sex and I asked why.
What did I say?
Don't ask me questions while I have an erection,
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
if happy hour never ends, you’ll never have to eat kale
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
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