Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
Your cousin just asked the bartender to start a round of vagina shots. Not body shots. Vagina shots. We're taking her out more often.
do you remember when we thought we were both knocked up by the same guy like two days apart and would have half twins? Thats a best friend moment.
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
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