I'm pounding a vodka drink as we speak to make her interesting
Whoever said drinking more helps a hangover didn't drink 96% of a fifth of whiskey last night. This is absurd.
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
When he identified himself as captain clitoris i knew my night was fucked.
Sorry my phone died. Obviously four o'clock in the morning is a good time to tell you this.
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
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