its not stalking. its research.
If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
My friend asked me if I got home okay and I replied "Glad teat. Goodnight." Usually I can translate drunk me, but I'm even lost on that one.
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
A log hopped out of the fireplace and caught the carpet on fire. Good summary of this election if you ask me.
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
Randomize
